In my life I had quite a few up's and downs, though nothing would prepare me for my early adult years. Throughout my teenage years my eyes were opened and I no longer seen the world the same way ever again. I started to become more serious in almost everything I did. I was mostly to myself and didn't have a lot a friends, but always kept a close circle. It was until my early adult years when I started to get into myself much more and other people as well, understanding other thoughts that I have never even sought to look for when I a little younger. I started meeting people left and right, and it was fun. Some of them were ok and some of them wasn't, but it was ok I just keep things going and moving on towards people who were more like me. That was until I met this one person who I thought who were on the same page as me, we laughed and had fun over the phone, met each other etc. I inspired them to not give up and keep pursuing the dream they want to in life. They seen how I was and what I was about, and sometimes how wild I could get. Especially since I felt that I was getting older, I wanted to be around others who energetic and fun. Anyone who knows me, knows that I could get too serious at times so around this time I decided to lighten things up from the usual and enjoy life and say screw it.
My more Punk Rock FTW side was coming out.
Before the big things started to add on it was the little things that bothered me about this person, like they would judge certain things I'm into and I'm thinking why do you want to be around me then.. Just go, but they would try to explain themselves in an intelligent way to make me think we could deal with certain differences and I thought we could. We connected when it came to conspiracies mostly and a few other things as well. In general I am more of a Horror/Goth/ Sci-fi person and they were more into beauty and some sci-fi type of things. Some things wasn't really appealing to me and vice versa from her. Different from me when it came to certain music, certain styles etc. Sort of an alternative person though she was more into the mainstream Beyonce, rap video stuff . Not that I couldn't deal with other differences because I like difference myself, but I said to myself and you like to judge others knowing what I'm about hmmmm? Red flags are starting to fly in the wind but I kept it to myself because I don't really like to judge.
Anyways I heard what this person went through in the past and I was very sympathetic towards them, but little did I know it would be a sort of downfall for me. I say that because I was always there for them though I didn't feel like at a crucial point in my life that they were there for me totally, maybe just a few times that is. I bought them things and spent hours with them sorting out certain plans not just messing around with them, though when I started to have my moments of stress, dealing with bad family members, and going through certain things especially after I have experienced a death in my family, afterwards that's when I noticed things changed they started to show their true colors. Besides I've heard behind my back they were saying other things about me, and I knew they looked down upon me because at this point in my life I was going through everything and they couldn't relate at all. Why did they pick during those moments to start being a different way to me? Going through things will make a person change the mood a little bit but I didn't really lose who out on who I was, I regained my strength and became more powerful. However I sort of felt that this person was always jealous of me because in their own words they grew up on the real rough side of life (mostly because of their actions towards others now that I see) Not that I didn't have my low times growing up but this person was in and out of foster homes, homeless, and as she got older things got worse. Now what would make this person switch up?? I had many gifts around me, a loving mother and father, certain good family members, lived in a great big house with many rooms, , many clothes, jewelry etc. so to them it appeared that I was rich, and in sense I didn't need much. I am grateful to have these things things but I didn't never really tried to make anyone feel low or unworthy. Even when I was younger I brought a homeless man of the street to give him a plate of food for thanksgiving. I have that type of heart. So still around this time life was less enjoyable now and not just because of her but the whole situation I was in. I knew at that moment even though they speak about a lot spiritual things-law of attraction etc they never practice what they preach, that they never understood how it is to have a close family member die, because they always were in a sense living on their own. So I guess in there eyes when it came to me I was like a goody too shoes and boyish with his family.
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Seriously they couldn't keep up with me mentally. I helped them from being suicidal at one point, and I was glad to see her come back from the brink of destruction. Then later I see that all they thought about was themselves and made it seem like the whole world was centered around them, and never really tried to see things wholeheartedly through another persons eyes. I was the one dealing with issues trying to reach out to them just to get mistreated in the end. So that is why they felt the wrath of true beast in the end because I just got tired of it this fakeness. By analyzing this whole situation, from how she twisted the story and from what others have told me now I know tons of things of how she treated and used other people in the past, and how she keeps using that same sorry story to get others to feel sorry for her. It's too bad she just wouldn't change her selfish ways. However now many have found out the truth about this deceiver and exaggerator which I'm glad to know and hopefully more in due time more.
So now in my life I am even more careful of whom I spend time with, because I see every one isn't worth it or worthy of my time. Plus sense I more of a secluded person when I DO consider someone my firend I truly mean that, yes I will become attached and I expect more not a false sense of friendship. After that I took some time off on people and started to have bad feelings of resentment, but now I am better than ever and even more aware how some could be. Do I regret meeting this person? In a sense perhaps , because I was enjoying my life a lot better before they walked into it. She seemed like an old nagging lady that is always miserable about everything, sometimes she was ok and fun and sometimes I felt brought around a bad vibe I didn't like, because of her jealous ways. One thing I could say is I did try to help this person succeed regardless of what they may say to others or how they feel about me, but when I give chances then they choose to bite the hands that feeds them it will only be a matter of time before they will feel my wraith. V''''V That is my policy for every and anyone who I consider a true friend and who is under my wing. Yes I'm the person who gave you a certain gift of joy and if needed I will take it back. That may seem like a bad point from me but I do not like fake people, tolerate betrayal, and I appreciate loyalty. I give people enough chances with me but I will be no one's tool. I treat others how I expect to be treated but when people complicate things and make themselves seem like the innocent one when they are far from it, people who just try to be in your business just to see if your failing I have to put my foot down. I am just a person who rather not deal with people like who chooses to live life being some type of rip off and fraud. So so long to the fake people and Hello to the real. Blessed Be )0( V'''V
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